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After awhile it did start to hurt because it felt almost like I was being hidden or under-valued. I was basically seen as a roommate renting a room. When we first started dating, he was extremely cautious about even telling anyone we were together. So us being publicly affectionate can directly harm his career. With that comes the old school mentality and mindsets about how ‘being gay is a sin’ and so on. In my case, my partners work is mostly dealing with people of his generation or older. It can affect a lot more than just your feelings. Public affection and other aspects of a relationship are more than just the two of you being happy with each other in that moment. Hiding your feelings from each other is going to lead to insecurities and deceptive things being done behind each others back, which ultimately is going to land up with one of you hurt and potentially breaking up. If it is hard to talk to one another about small things, it is going to be even worse on major things that come up later on. It is very important that you and your partner are open and honest with each other about everything. It is important to understand that your feelings are not the only feelings in the relationship and that when it comes to public aspects of the relationship, there is more than just your feelings and point of view involved.
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But, the other thing I would also say is that it is important to remember and understand that a relationship is two people working together.
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